Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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