she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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