My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Randomize
