We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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