Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
