hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
