It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize