Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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