I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
