u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I am puke
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
