a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize