who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
