Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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