He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
