No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I had to cum in my sink.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
