It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize