Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I still have a little drunk in my system
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize