Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You were trust falling into bushes
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
