I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
