we have officially lost it.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize