First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Randomize
