Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
