She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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