Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
