If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize