how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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