so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
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