I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
All I want is dick and wine.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
