Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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