if i can run in heels then i can drive
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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