holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
