my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
