we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Tornado booty call.. dedication
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
