guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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