my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize