Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
