it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
