what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
