is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Bring me that man meat
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
