i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i came on her dog
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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