And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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