Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
So. Much. Porn.
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