Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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