I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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