I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Your cock deserves a montage
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize