I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
