so that wasnt chicken after all
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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