he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
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