We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
