hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
