saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
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